Upset of the year...
...didn't happen. But the Falcons put up a good fight for two and a half quarters. For that, I was thankful on the Thanksgiving holiday. Also, big props to my little brother who got us tickets through his drug and/or pimp connections. Not sure what he's doing these days, but when the end results are football tickets, I'm not asking.
Labels: Atlanta, Football, Games
« November 23, 2007 4:57 PM | Post a Comment | 0 comments »
Updates
Fantasy Football
My JammyDodgers just won their sixth fantasy football game of the season (6-3). It was a most unprobable win and it was only by 2 points, but I'll take it all the same, especially since I didn't have to resort to cheating. I've been pretty good at not doing that yet (cheating, I mean), but there are five remaining games and I'll probably end up down that shameful but winful path. How do I know? I cheat at solitaire and I've done it all my life. I'm not going to stop now and I know it.
Inner Peace
I've had a few relapses, but overall, I'm a pretty pleasant person to be around. Finally!, you say. The Dalai Lama is like magic! The magic was wearing off a little today, but I don't really expect myself to be calm 100% of the time. I'd have to check my pulse or put a little mirror under my nose every few hours and I don't like carrying around little mirrors.
Nanowrimo
Yes, I'm doing it again. This is how excited I am about it. I'm not really complaining about this completely voluntary competition because that would be annoying. I do look at it like, "another November, another novel" and I wish I could be more excited about it. But there's nothing very exciting about writing and authors unless you're J.K. Rowling and get to re-upset zealoty bigots with the gay wizard Dumbledore. No, not gray wizard; that's Gandalf.
Zoe's Ark
I don't really understand how anyone, let alone a humanitarian group, can believe that they have the right to take children away from their parents (in Chad) and fly them to another country (France) to be adopted. They also convinced some French journalists and a Spanish flight crew into helping them, thus igniting an international crisis. French President Sarkozy came in and rescued some of the hoodwinked journalists and flight attendants from the jails (literally, I think he piloted the plane), but this is strange and it's French and it's not over.
Labels: Books, Football, Games, News
« November 06, 2007 8:38 PM | Post a Comment | 0 comments »
Humongous Vegas
This being my fourth trip to Vegas, I really didn't have much interest in taking pictures...until I stepped into this bathroom stall at MGM and saw Ingrid Bergman. I whipped out my camera phone and didn't even check to see if I pulled up my pants. If you look in the reflection, you'll know the answer. Please don't look too hard.
In my dreams, getting a royal flush meant thousands of dollars with balloons falling out of the sky as the flashing light on top of the machine goes crazy. In real life, playing a one cent 100 hand vp machine and hitting a royal flush means six...dollars and an empty 7+7 glass (and no balloons). Do you know that the odds of hitting a royal flush are 1 in 649740 hands? I basically hit the only royal flush of my life and got six dollars for it. That's just great. Also, the picture is not blurry. This is how the screen looked through my tears; first, out of happiness and then later, out of realization of what 600 credits multipied by one cent really means.
I spent my six dollar royal flush winnings rather quickly. I also placed some sports bets and played some parlay cards. This is all that's left. On the upside, I did eat many, many one-dollar hot dogs while watching every single football game on Sunday. Do not ask me to quantify "many, many".
It's no secret: the whole reason I go to Vegas is for Celine. This is the hallowed store in Caesars Palace where I have purchased more Celine branded items than I should ever admit, but I'm gonna tell you anyway. This time, I got a short glass, a postcard and (another) show program.
And the woman herself...kinda. This is the entrance to the Colosseum where I saw Celine for the fifth and final (hoo hoo) time. She's as nuts as ever, but I love her for her wackiness. That's my head between Celine's ...um, below Celine's... no, I mean at the bottom of the picture. Yes, that's what I really mean to say. Thanks for the Vegas experience, Celine! I'll see you again someday, but probably not as close as five feet. Dammit, restraining orders cramp my style. Right, Isabelle?
Labels: Celine, Football, Games, Vegas
« September 26, 2007 9:00 PM | Post a Comment | 0 comments »
Fantastically uninteresting
Because this will probably be the high point of the season for me, I'm going to be obnoxious (it's gonna be a stretch) and gloat over the ass-kicking I gave my fantasy football league this weekend:
-- Carson Palmer threw for six (six!) touchdowns and a thousand yards and the Bengals still lost because not only did they dress like an Arena football team, they played like one. For real, any team with uniforms that horrendous can never really be called "winners".
-- Each of my running backs scored 20 points for me.
-- My stud WR Andre Johnson caught two TDs (no, not STDs, although I can neither verify nor confirm that) and then he went and sprained his knee. A real stud can not be a gimpy stud!
-- Calvin Johnson and newly acquired Broncos Brandon Marshall performed exactly as expected and that's all I ask for.
-- Let's not talk about Tony Gonzalez.
-- Jeff Wilkins booted a 53 yarder along with 2 more field goals. I'm going to ignore the 56 yard attempt that would've won the game against the 49ers. But I like the 49ers, so it's all good.
-- My man-tasy player Champ Bailey and the Denver defense picked off 2 passes and sacked the QB 4 times.
All in all, I racked up over 150 points. Next closest? 108. I'm going to ride this wave all the way to Vegas for next week's games where I'll surely have a craptastic Sunday because real money will be on the line and I get nervous around real money. But, that's okay. I'm a winner this week, mostly because I'm not a Bengal wearing that ridiculous uniform and losing to the even more ridiculous Cleveland Browns. I mean, what's a Brown?
- The sharpest crayon in the box? (if you get this, you are like so awesome)
- A shipping company with bad commercials?
- A player for the worst team in the NFL?
- No, wait, that's a Falcon.
« September 17, 2007 4:55 PM | Post a Comment | 0 comments »
Draft Day!
...is over. Man, it was quick. I don't even remember who I selected. I better recap and make sure I don't have a stinkin' New England Patriot on my team:
- Frank Gore (RB, SF) - With his hand unbroken by the first week, he's going to go grape ape this year with an improved 49ers offense.
- Carson Palmer (QB, Cincy) - I'm shocked that I physically could select a Bengal player with his Arena League quality uniform, but I'll root for him this season with my eyes closed.
- Edgerrin James (RB, AZ) - He'll put up great numbers like 2005...because missing out on a Super Bowl championship by one year has got to make anyone bitter. (He used to be a Colt.)
- Andre Johnson (WR, Houston) - He's practically the only real offensive threat on the Texans so Matt Schaub will get the ball to him a lot.
- Calvin Johnson (WR, Detroit) - The rookie from Ga Tech will make an instant impact. It can't get any worse in Detroit, can it?
- Tony Gonzalez (TE, KC) - The musical-chair QB situation in KC means that short dump offs to the TE is a given all season long.
- Vincent Jackson (WR, SD) - Someone's got to be the #1 receiver when LT's not scoring touchdowns. This guy is it.
- Ahman Green (RB, Houston) - With two starting RBs in the top 10 of most fantasy lists, I only plan to use Green in bye weeks.
- Denver (DEF) - Confession: this pick was my way of drafting Champ Bailey since I couldn't draft individual defensive players. I probably didn't need to explain that.
- Mark Clayton (WR, Baltimore) - I'm going to give him some starts depending on the schedule. McNair likes to air it out and Clayton is the Raven's deep threat.
- J.P. Losman (QB, Buffalo) - He's the best QB no one's heard of.
- Jeff Wilkins (K, St. Louis) - Who? Only one of the top 5 kickers in the league, which means crap in fantasy football.
- Randy McMichael (TE, St. Louis) - He's a top 5 TE and I got him in this late round. I guess it shows how much no one pays attention to this position.
- Josh Scobee (K, Jacksonville) - I admit it. I picked him for his name. Skoh-BEE. Awesome.
- Minnesota (DEF) - Some mock drafts had this defense highly rated. Obviously no one I'm playing against saw these drafts.
Whew. I'm Patriot-free. I'm actually very happy with all my picks, especially my pseudo Champ Bailey one. Woo hoo. Are you ready for some football? I'm ready for some Champ!
Labels: Football
« August 26, 2007 2:50 PM | Post a Comment | 0 comments »
Fantasy football
I got bored, drunk and signed up for fantasy football today (not necessarily in that order). Some thoughts while I sober up:
- If TONKS! (Natalia Tena) played football and was a real person and all that, she'd totally be my number one (that's #1!) draft pick. Girl is tough.
- If I can figure out a widget to show how my season progresses, I'll add it...unless it shows my season sucking. Then nevermind. I never said nothing about no widget.
- The Falcons will not be the cellar dweller of the league, no matter how crappy the offseason has been. Look to my other faves (the Raiders) for that awesome distinction.
- TONKS! is awesome, but she's not a real person. I have to remember this.
- Joey Harrington smiles a lot for a football player. Maybe a little too much...
- Everyone wants to draft Ladainian Tomlinson first (even me) and I hate doing what everyone else does. I have to work through this issue soon. My league drafts in two weeks.
- I refuse to draft any New England players, even if they are good and score lots of points and play well every week and all that crap. I have my principles.
- I haven't stopped drinking since I got up this morning and look how I'm still spelling every word correctly. It's both a blessing and a curse.
- If TONKS! was real person, I...should not finish this sentence.
Labels: Football
« August 12, 2007 2:50 PM | Post a Comment | 0 comments »
